Rise

SHE IS CLOTHED IN STRENGTH AND DIGNITY AND LAUGHS WITHOUT FEAR OF THE FUTURE.

PROVERBS 31:25

 

I open my blog and this is the first thing that I see. As I sat and looked at it I thought, this is one of my  favorite verses and after my Nana died one I promised to live by. I realized lately I haven't done it justice. 

The last year I've built up numerous insecurities and without realizing it let them control part of my life. I feel like only have control over part of my life. But no Nicole, you have control of all of it. 

Everyone is talking about there word for the year and I figured mine out within the first day of the new year but I never really declared it over my life.

I think I've let myself slip into routine. I've dishonored my word because I let it just become routine, just let it become something I did and not let it be a part of my everyday. 

My word for the year was Rise. Now before I start defining my word let me paint you a picture of last year. 

 

A year ago I chose the word FIGHT for 2012. At that time I had no clue what my year would look like. There was nothing chaotic or turbulent about my life so I really had no idea as to why god gave it to me. It wasn't until now I realized how that word really framed my year. 

I was 100% under attack from the devil during 2012. What did I do, I fought. I remember one thing I kept reminding myself last year was this thought, "Hey Satan, what else you got cause I'm still standing. " All year long was blow by blow against what felt like a brick wall   and then in December he tried one last blow with trying to make my parents divorce. And Satan. I'm still standing.

 

 2012 is over and I can see why God gave me the word Fight. 

I can only start to conceive why god gave me the word Rise. I started thinking what it could mean. So like I always do I went to define the word.

//RISE//

 

  VERB

MOVES FROM A LOWER POSITION TO A HIGHER ONE

NOUN

AN UPWARD MOVEMENT

 

That right there got me. After reading this I kinda feel like everything I know has shattered. God always astounds me in the most amazing ways making me fall even more in love with him. I'm not going to define what rise means for me, because honestly I don't know yet. But for the last month I've been feeling god is definitely up to something big. I know the last year was challenging but it was for a reason and I know this year god is going to RAISE me to where I can't even imagine. 

This year I'm going to do what Nicole wants and just start taking the next step and not the next 5 year plan step. Giving god more room to move in my life, which is huge cause I'm a control freak. 1/5/10 year plan person. I feel like sometime I let god have control...but I still make sure I have the reigns. 

I'm ready for god to take me to the next level, what that holds who knows, and who cares. Cause I'm ready.

BEST VIDEO EVER

Time for a new adventure.

I really really should be continuing my homework, but I got distracted as always and have been really wanting to blog again. My problem is there's so many things happening and so many little thoughts popping around my head i don't know where to start. So lets start with a post about the big decision i've made recently.

I've decided to go on exchange. And all of you reading this probably already know this.

I'm so excited. A year ago I wouldn't have even thought about taking this opportunity. I always have wanted to travel but there never seemed to be money for it and I couldn't see a gap in time that I could do it. I'm always so focused on what's next I need to get this done, I need to get that done, responsibility responsibility blah blah blah. And sometimes there's so much crap in life that I just throw myself into work to blow that steam off and forget about it, which worries my for my future. But i'm 21, isn't this when i'm supposed to be travelling and figuring myself out. I've had my career basically figured out since i was 10 years old and since then there really hasn't been much room for adventure. 

I figured there's always time, and honestly I can make more money. This will be an investment in my future i'm more than okay making. The experiences I will have alone will pay for the trip over and over.

So the plan is to leave in August 2014 travel and visit in Europe for a month then arrive in Helsinki, Finland and do school for 4 months.

I'm not going to lie I am excited, but i'm completely scared shitless to be in another country all on my own. But that's what makes me believe it's completely from God. I have complete peace amongst the fear about it.

I just have to work my but off and get selected, because only two students per IDSN year get selected.